17Twenty

E167 || Kevin and Stewart || Changing Seasons

Stewart Shurtleff & Kevin Carey Season 5 Episode 6

Time has a funny way of slipping by.  Sometimes it's just a week or a month; sometimes it's entire years. 

On today's episode, we grapple with this feeling, acknowledging that it's the rich blend of our experiences, not just the ticking clock, that molds us into who we are. The enduring wisdom of Dale Payne [E087] becomes an anchor for us as we talk through various seasons of life and remind listeners to cherish each interaction with the keen awareness that the unpredictability of life makes these moments invaluable. 

Closing with reflections on the role of faith and community during the toughest seasons, we share stories of silent support, the power of presence, and the immense strength drawn from a tribe that stands steadfastly by your side.

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Speaker 1:

I don't think you could just automatically get there like read a book here or podcast and then you're there. You have to experience it. You got to feel it. You got to feel that roller coaster, unfortunately a little bit.

Speaker 2:

Every single individual has a story to tell, and they're great stories that need to be heard.

Speaker 1:

I want every listener to know they have the ability to change the world.

Speaker 2:

Welcome to the 1720 podcast.

Speaker 1:

What's up, Mount Movers? Welcome back to the 1720 podcast. And just like that, we are entering the middle of February.

Speaker 2:

How is that possible? It's not possible. The idea that it's all going by so quickly is it's crazy, but it just. I know we said it not too long ago. It just feels like it's the phase of life, too, where busy big gets busy and then it's on all day, exhausted off on all day, and then you wake up and a week has passed.

Speaker 2:

I was talking to somebody the other day and it was. It could very well have been my dad, who, but I forget who was talking about how they felt. Like you know some people, they take the medicine, and was it you talking about taking the medicine and putting it in the weekly containers and do that now.

Speaker 2:

So it wasn't either saying it, but they feel like they, you know, they have like the Monday, saturday, sunday, monday, whatever, and they feel like they've just filled it up every day putting and it was just sort of an example of how fast the week goes by. You're just, you feel like you're filling up your vitamins and whatever medicines you're taking weekly planner every day because the day, because it's all going so fast and it's probably part of the new year and everybody's off to a roaring start and also just parts of seasons of life. So, yeah, mid-february here we go.

Speaker 1:

I feel like January flies by faster than December, at least for me, because January is like strap plan season. You got boards, companies, personal family setting the year out and all of it flies by, I feel, quicker than December. It's nuts yeah.

Speaker 2:

That's the plight of a lawyer too, because what you end up with is people passing on deadlines and bumping things into the new year because really they just want to make it to a Christmas party or whatever. And then January hits. It's like, oh, we lined up a deposition every day this week and just all the trial settings that were in late year get pushed into the new year. And you know, back a few years ago even I don't know if you recall, but when I was preparing to try that case and it just like bogged me down so much, this was the season it kicked off. I think January 5th was the day that the trial kicked off, because we had bumped it past the holidays and just January got here and six weeks of trial later it was mid-February. So Off and running Off and running Off and running. Yeah.

Speaker 1:

I will say this is the time where you settle in a little bit, right. So, like you've had six weeks under your belts to build some routine or get out of the craziness, and now you need to find your routine, go revisit those goals. If you've gotten away from them because of the craziness, still got plenty of year left, right. So you evaluate where you're at and where you're going.

Speaker 2:

Well, an unintended benefit, if you will, of rerunning Brent Gleason's episode last week was that he talked about something that we talked about all the time, which is writing that stuff down, writing it down and revisiting it. And here you are with an opportunity to hopefully you wrote it down and revisit it, because it's again. We're one-twelfth of the way through this year. You know, check in, how are you doing? For?

Speaker 1:

sure, and that's kind of where we're going today, at least with the first bit, is seasons of life, a lot of reflection and where we've come from and where we're going. And when I do this, I think of Dale Payne's episode a lot. Oh yeah, man do I love that dude. What an awesome guy. And I think he was rocking our foundation when he was breaking down those four seasons. And we're not going to break down those four seasons as part of this episode, but that's what it had me thinking about, like, what seasons of life are we on?

Speaker 1:

It was mutual friend, chase Wood. I had lunch with him today and we were laughing at all the things we're facing, you know, and so could you imagine if we were trying to handle this five years ago, like all of the things. And we laughed out loud for a good bit, because it's funny when you reflect back, like what you used to sweat as the biggest deal five years ago. If you're progressing in life, right, you look back on it, you're like man, those problems were very minute, you know, in the grand scheme of things, and I think that comes with some age, some wisdom, some maturity and some life experience, where you just get more settled in.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, it across all different areas of your life, too, right, like the things you're worried about professionally or personally, or relationally, or in your spiritual journey, or whatever they've all grown you know. Let me also send listeners back to Dale's episode, because if you haven't listened to it, it's episode 87. It's called 29,220 days and he talks through, like I think it's four different seasons or phases, right, and he does a really good job and I think it's OG Dale Payne. I don't think, as I recall, he had read it anywhere. It was just how he had blocked off those phases of your life and the challenges and the way you morph through them and things like this. It's great, it's from back in 2002, mid 2002. So go back and, when you're finished with this, scroll back on your Spotify or Apple podcast or whatever and go check it out if you hadn't listened, and that's a great, great episode.

Speaker 1:

And we get some base level stats and that's one of those that just it keeps ticking. So people must be continuing to talk about it and like, hey, if you haven't listened to this one, they need to check it out because you could see it in the numbers. Yeah, very baseline what we get, but you could see it continuing to increase.

Speaker 2:

Yes, yeah, it's funny how there's the five or six of them that sit right in there and, like the ones that are steady, going up. It must be indicative of and I definitely have some favorite children that I recommend people go listen to, and I suspect others are too, and they're probably all the same. So those five or six episodes continually building, even though it's been almost two years. It's been almost two years since we recorded with Dale, but it's still going up. Have you seen Dale in a minute?

Speaker 1:

I saw him at the Texo Gala, so okay, so you saw the hair of how long his hair is, oh, just long locks of beautiful hair.

Speaker 2:

I was just like, hey, can I touch it? It's just long and flowing. And we shared a good laugh about it, not that it was funny. Look, it's just like. Here it is, man Just going for it, it looks awesome. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, that's the last time I saw it. We were going to catch up. And then holidays right, it's holidays in January, blue by and here we are mid-February. So I need to reach back out and catch up with good old Dale.

Speaker 2:

I changed his. Everything's a squirrel. I changed his you know, the change of the pictures on your phone to yes, you know, actually Do not ask Kevin to text you my contact because that is tragic, but in any event, there's. Dale sent us, remember, after the after recording. He sent us, like his high school, I think it's his high school yearbook photo and I saved that one. Yep, that's it. You did it too. It's the same picture. Mine actually says Larry Dale Payne, though, because I didn't realize until the time we recorded that his name was Larry Dale, and so mine says Larry Dale Payne, but it has that same high school tuxedo senior photo and it's amazing.

Speaker 1:

So I didn't know that. I'm kind of Definitely the old man in the room when it comes to technology, so I didn't know. When you share a contact, it even sends the picture that you personally have saved. Yeah, I notoriously have a lot of bad pictures of my like the closer the friend, the worst the picture I probably have of you, yeah, and Jim Parker has from that Fisher's number it's so I had no idea that his selfie from an airplane of him making a certain face Would go to Jim Parker, and so their opening conversation I'll have to tell you it offline Gave me a very good laugh. It's like opening comment to Matt. Yeah, I think that this some.

Speaker 2:

I Couldn't have been the same thing, but something similar. Maybe you just shared the picture with, with Jim Parker, because he's he texted me mine back one time too and I was just like that only comes from one place, like the only place that picture comes from is you, and I mean you thought, gosh, darn it.

Speaker 1:

Whoops, yeah, you name a close friend there. Yeah, they got a terrible. It's not their LinkedIn photo, I could promise you that.

Speaker 2:

Oh man, oh yes, well, any event, we find ourselves in the ditch again. Season's alive let's. I'm gonna try to see if I can yank us back over there, cuz you're, we were talking generally about the things that used to stress you out Five years ago or whatever sort of laughable these days derivative of a bunch of different things. Right, but you know you start to learn what's important, how to handle more things. It's one of the analogies we've used is the balloon. What's? The balloon gets blown up bigger, its capacity stays, stays large. So you've handled enormous things and dealt with difficult challenges and the balloon never goes back to small. You know, it's Capable of so much more capable, holding so much more than it was before, and that's what happens over time and stepping into challenges and all this sort of stuff. So I don't know if there I think we probably have more to riff on that. I was just kind of saying those things to bring us back to back to base for continuing the conversation.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and I think we'll. We'll cover it as we go. But I think what happens is you start locking into what's most important. You know, like a, you know to the purpose solar system, maybe some false Suns along the way, so like, if work is the Sun of my solar system and something goes wrong with work, it feels like the sky is falling. But when work isn't the Sun of my solar system and it's rightfully a planet, so just a category, yeah, when something goes wrong, it's like, hey, you know, faith remains, our purpose Remains no matter what, and we're gonna have tough seasons, we're gonna have good seasons, we're gonna have some down-the-middle seasons, and you, you plow through them. And when you have that mindset going into, it just allows you to process it a little more. I don't think you could just automatically get there like read a book here or podcasts and then You're there. You have to experience it. You got to feel it. You got to feel that roller coaster, unfortunately a little bit.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, that's not there's something about them going hand-in-hand to, because now speak for myself only, but there are seasons that you pass through that if you hadn't put some of those tools in your toolbox, you wouldn't know how to how to use them in the moments. But you don't. Without the tools, you know, you don't get the experience of using them, and so you have to have both Be ready for it and you have to have the moment to use whatever it is in order to really, I think, fully gain that experience. And that goes in terms of leadership or technical expertise or and this is the most I Don't know probably in guiding one for me, but in terms of like speaking into scripture for people's lives. Like if you're not in the word and Someone comes to you and they want to talk about something and there's not some like Spirit breathed word of God on on the tip of your tongue because you've been in the minute.

Speaker 2:

Like you got nothing for him, you have no tools for your toolbox, it's just something happening. You know what I mean? Yeah, and so that's been one of the most convicting things of this particular season. We get, we get into it later, but At church we're doing some like Back to the basics, sort of stuff with Prayer and reading and fasting, and it's just like man. Those are convicting moments. If you're not equipping yourself With the tools of the trade and you can use those in all different aspects of life, you're not equipping yourself with your tools of trade. You're not gonna know how to do it when it gets here, man.

Speaker 1:

So 100% and that's the consistency piece. With faith we got to be putting those reps in yeah, for sure, for sure.

Speaker 2:

The um. I'm looking at your sort of word words on a page from prepping for today and you have some. It's a funny idea because I've thought about it from time to time. The being in the baby season is the one we use. Actually, I say like we're in the baby season where everybody's having a baby. I remember being in baby season, but you, you categorize, I'll say, some seasons of life in interesting ways. I'll let you talk through them, but they're not time-based, they're sort of like phase of life-based. So sure, when you walk through these, everybody's like oh yeah, I've been in that one before.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yeah, that all depends where you're at in life. You know, this is just, I would say, in the circles we're predominantly running in right now, like we're kind of parallel in age and in life in general. But when I reflect back, you know I guess early 20s, mid 20s, the season was save the date season, you know, with your circle and sphere, you had those magneted to your fridge and you were trying to figure out which ones you could go to. For me I had family ones and those were really tough decisions with not having a ton of money to fly back home. You know who makes the cut, sort of thing. Yeah, but there was a ton of weddings and some were in other countries and destination and some were local and you got to, I got to feel for the differences and weddings between the south and the north and what traditions hold and the standards and the mixing and clashing of those.

Speaker 2:

But okay, stop, I got pause. I have no idea what you're talking about. Sometimes when we're chatting, I'm just tracking. I'm like I know where this is headed. What are the differences? I guess I've only been to southern weddings. I don't know that I've ever been to a northern wedding.

Speaker 1:

Really.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1:

So Chicago standard, you're covering your plate that's pretty much the rule of thumb, at a minimum with cash. So you're showing up with a card and it's got cash money in it, Okay, and so like if it's myself, Sadie and Quinn, I'm probably putting three bills in there, Like that's like it got to cover the plate. Nowadays it's probably about a hundred a plate.

Speaker 2:

And so cover your plate is like just, I think and this is for listeners and for me you're talking about like the cost associated with having you attend the meal, the whatever that's the plate you're covering, and the banquet style meal is about a, about a Benji plate, and so that's why you're saying you got three bills in an envelope.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and I'm going to pull your mind right now If you've never. But there's a receiving line, like there's, it's part of it, like you get in line and you shake hands and hand the card off, or there's this huge box and everybody's putting the cards in it, and what you're more accustomed to, however, is the Southern side, where it's usually like a gift at the shower. Then you just show up to the wedding or maybe a little something at the wedding.

Speaker 1:

And so at our wedding, my wife's from Magnolia, arkansas. You had the clash of two like half of them are like lined up or looking where to put the card. The other half are wondering why they had cards in the first place. So it was, you know, it was a mix of both.

Speaker 2:

My mind is kind of blown on that because I will tell you I know that I've thought it. I've only been to one Northern wedding. We can come to that or not, it does, it's not really relevant, Only Southern weddings. And I always, I've always, until this minute, thought the only people who bring gifts to weddings are people who weren't able to make it to the shower, just like you said. And so there's like a small table with a few people and you're like, ah, they couldn't make it Right. It's just like it's an air fryer and a mixing bowl over there. They just couldn't make it to the shower.

Speaker 1:

Now wedding showers. The warm up in Chicago.

Speaker 2:

That's just I be day.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, primed up.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, also kind of got a mob feel to it, like just white envelopes full of cash. I suspect there's a correlation here we needn't explore, but it feels real. Sopranos.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, for sure. Okay, I don't remember which one it was, but I used my standard protocol out here and somebody like called me or something like are you out of your mind? I'm like what? And then that was my first taste of all. There's some differences geographically on the two dues.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, okay, good to know. Didn't ever know that's a complete stop down moment Moving on.

Speaker 1:

But now we all are Massive ditch.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, massive ditch. Now we're all smarter for it.

Speaker 1:

So you got save the date season and naturally that evolves into what you alluded to earlier baby season. Yeah, the baby showers, the first kiddo, and now your fridge is full of baby shower notifications and registries, and that's a fun season.

Speaker 2:

Birth announcements, to go around after it and you go, and then you're like don't wait.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I'm not seeing many, if any. Save the dates now. If so, like I'm one of the oldest on both sides of our family, so it might be a younger cousin at this point. Yeah, but it's very few and far between, and even babies now are at the tail end. It's trailing off quite a bit. Yeah, but it used to be loaded down and some were what would you call that unisex.

Speaker 1:

And some were female only, but I've even went to a few that were couples, which was cool. They like to go to a baby shower that was couples, not just women. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, it does feel like it's the dudes do something and or the women do something, but it's rarely couples. But that's interesting yeah.

Speaker 1:

I've been to. So I don't know if that again that's a geographical thing or just a sign of the times, but I've done all sorts of different baby showers and obviously had our own with Quinn, and those are fun. Those are fun seasons. And now what I'm seeing, what led me to this reflection, is Debbie Downer moments. Not so fun seasons. Yeah, you know, those are awesome, and now I call this the caring bridge season.

Speaker 2:

I'll go Debbie Downer with you before you get to caring bridge season and maybe these go side by side. But I also feel like there is divorce season. You're like, oh so, and so they got, and then they didn't work out and they're not sending out save the dates, no like.

Speaker 1:

Hey, slashes on your fridge.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, but I do remember, you know, between baby season and caring bridge season, if you will divorce season or you're just like, wait what they're? Yeah, it's just you know what to say. Some of them are weird and I know everybody has a story about how you're like, well, we were couples friends but now we can't be couples friends and I feel like we had to pick a side and all that like just continued Debbie Downer phase of it that I think then leads to caring bridge season and I doubt, like when I didn't know what you were going to say about that, but when I saw it written on the paper I was like, yeah, I feel that man, I feel that for sure right now.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and I'm not, I'm not knocking the platform.

Speaker 2:

No.

Speaker 1:

It is amazing because and caring bridges out there for any tragedies that happen, uh, there's one source or spot to update the families, if you've never heard of it, and update everyone that wants to be in the know and figure out how they can support Uh, so you can kind of leave the families alone. Is kind of my personal opinion. Like that, instead of me pestering the person that's just trying to deal with the situation, this will update me and then I can pray and support and march to the orders of caring bridge. And there's been, I think. Since I've heard of caring bridge, I haven't been off it. So, you know, six straight months of there's always something on it and some of them are some Outlier tragedies, for sure.

Speaker 1:

But where my Mind starts going with this is, you know, the generation above us, couple generations above us, the parents, the grandparents. Yeah, and it's tough, man, and it's it's. It's seeing a different side of things and seeing people band together and and support, and Seeing people walk through things before you walk through them. You know, you might have been the first of your group to walk through it, but I'm not. You know I'm. I'm watching these things go down and grieving with my friends and circles, but it's also preparing, yeah, and I think there's some, there's some health to that of of Cherishing the moment, and so when I was able to go back to Chicago for that keynote, being able to book lunch with my grandma, which I call Grammy, we spent four hours.

Speaker 2:

Oh, wow.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, just, and at one point she looked at me. Well, she was talking and I, because I went in with the attention of, like I am gonna make, I'm gonna hear every word. Yeah, yeah, the phone, the phone can go in of the water. I don't care about the phone, I don't care about anything that goes on for this shift. This is, this is VIP. You, you know, you're the second biggest reason I'm here. You know like, yeah, yeah, the work is what brought me here, but I'm coming to see you and I'm looking at her like this, like because that's how I pay attention, and mid sentence she just like grabs her hand, she's like, oh, don't be sad. She like reaches out to me and she's like what's wrong? Like, oh sorry, grammy, I'm just really listening.

Speaker 2:

We're just locked in, just laser beam locked in Grammy, keep going.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and man, we covered so much ground and I'll cherish that time together forever. And we've, we've talked about it. I think sprung from Jesse, it's lured. You know, you don't have number of years, you have number of experiences. Yeah and every single time a carrying bridge opens up, for whatever reason, that it reminds me that life is short and we got to cherish these moments, because we don't know how many we got. So when I'm with somebody, I'm gonna make it count.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, that's. I mean, if anybody needed a reminder, that's a good one. I you're. If you didn't, if you're not on the DM list, get on the deal list, dm list. If you didn't Watch Holly's video from last week, watch it, because it's it's different, sort of different facing, but it's same in the sense that the gist of it was you're gonna miss this, which is a.

Speaker 2:

It's a song and I forget who it's written by, but it's. It's one of those that when it hits the radio Like it'll make me stop down because I'm just like man, I Probably am gonna miss it. It's a refrain in our house, I'm gonna miss it. But oftentimes you're like, well, I'm not gonna miss these stupid shoes in the middle of the floor, I'm not gonna miss that. And you put them away and then you just think about a minute where they're? They're not there and what that means. I'm probably not gonna miss the shoes, but I'm gonna miss what that means and it's it's quickly fading at our. I mean we'll intern 16 over the holidays. You drive in and I I just don't seem as much anymore and it's sad. And and in the arc back over the top of that to the other side is you know how many more times you'll see Grammy. You know, mm-hmm. It reminds me.

Speaker 2:

This time it was right after that trial was over. I don't know if you remember this story or not, but it was right after that trial was over. We're just talking about, and we took our last witness on a Monday and I Just something in my heart I was like tugging me to go see my, my Mimi, and I told dad, was like we're going to see Mimi, okay, and we drove out there and spent two days, kind of kind of like what you're talking about with Grammy and just sit there and Just talked about the birds I don't even know right like we just didn't even just talking. And then we came home in like two weeks Two weeks almost the day she passed away after that and it's just one of the situations where I so glad I did it. But also, like the number of experiences there as it will expire, you will use them all and you don't know. You don't know when it is.

Speaker 2:

I was fortunate enough when I meet me that when I left I had a like a real piece that like I kind of felt like that was it. She was not in great health and I thought this is probably the last time I'll see her. But you don't know, you don't always know that, like you don't always get that piece, and the thing that I told somebody last week was that, 16, he's almost 6 to, he's a huge human, and I don't know the last time he crawled up in my lap and asked me to read him a book. I don't remember that. So those moments are just Fleeting by you, every moment that it's the last, and not perhaps the eternal last, like we're talking about my Mimi but it's the last time your kid is gonna need help tying his shoes, or it's the last time you're gonna see your mom, or you know they're just flying by. So Pay attention, man, because if you know, if you're not, you're gonna miss it for sure.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, there's a big part of the end of the speech I sometimes do is Rocking chair moments and talking about looking back at the twilight of your life. But the deal with tomorrow is not guaranteed. You're not guaranteed rocking chair moments. Oh, I'm not guaranteed that a space on that rocking chair. You don't know if you're gonna get there and you know we're not trying to be so doom and gloom, but it's a sobering, sobering reminder that what's guaranteed is this moment right now, right, nothing else. So what are you doing with it?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, it's a, it's not. I mean, it feels doom and gloom. If someone jumped in here at the 22 minute mark on accent, they're like oh my gosh, these guys have lost their sadness mind.

Speaker 1:

But I could be, or over here with yeah right out of room.

Speaker 2:

But it's not. It's not that, it's not about that, it's no. It's not about the doom and gloom. It's about we're kind of reframing it all and appreciating the moment that you're in and cherishing the moments and Not making it that big of a deal. Whatever that is it says would say I think I've said on her before it's Hayes. Would say it's not that deep bro, it's not that deep bro. I'm like yeah, you're right, it's not that deep. Yeah, basketball is not that important, it's not that, it's not that deep. And it doesn't matter if you made, if you went three for four, three for three, it doesn't matter, it's not that big, it's not big. No, it's moving on.

Speaker 1:

And if you're stuck in that rut of how do I, how do I, get out of making this such a big deal? You know, here's the Jesus Duke, it's faith. Yeah, you know, faith is the standard, no matter where you're at in life. Like the, the unwavering faith means I Am gonna be faithful in the good times. When, when everything's going good, who gets the glory? When it? When the seasons of just like it just feels like endless blah days, there's thankfulness in that, yeah.

Speaker 1:

And then, when things get real tough, faithfulness. You know, like the answer is the same for all three, right or whatever, wherever you're at. And so Like, if you're in a tough season, having faith that you're gonna pull out, having faith that you're gonna take one step in the right direction To to pull you out of that season, or aim it in a direction that's towards a purpose or whatever the case may be. Or like you and I talked about a couple weeks ago offline, maybe it's time for you to stop carrying it, whatever you're carrying, and lay it at his feet and say, hey, bro, I don't got this like, I don't know why I'm wrestling with this by myself, but sure would love some help and support right now. And that's faith in relationship.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and it's easier to be Thankful in the mountain tops right, it's the, it's those valleys where you have to like, that's where it's challenging and you're being taught something. And you know, I think probably your, the instinct of your flesh is to say why me instead of, not instead of. What are you teaching me and how can I use this Like to glorify and bring honor to God? And that's hard. What was it Nikia said last week Um faith, easy to say but not easy to do something like that. So I got a butcher to play. Yeah, yeah, and that's tough.

Speaker 2:

We had a testimony at church this week. If I could figure out how to clip it and snip it and drop it in here, I do it, but I don't think I figured out. But it was just about a sick child and as they were talking, giving a testimony about the sick child, they said something to the effect of Like whatever happens, right, like if it's. If it's your decision to to bring our child home to you, let that be glorifying. And if it's your decision to let that child come back home with us, let that like whatever is the most glorifying to God, let that happen. And I just set their slack jawed Mm-hmm, just thinking what I Sometimes you, you hear those stories. You think, yeah, I would do that if I had that, if that I just set their slack jaw, thinking I don't know if I could do that. Ah.

Speaker 1:

And I think these the caring Briggs, bridge season for those people that their faith meters through the roof, like seeing that before I walked through, because that wouldn't have been my natural inclination yeah, if I would have, if I would have been on the starting blocks, the timeline wise, I needed to see it a few times.

Speaker 2:

I'm gonna. I'm gonna go back to caring bridge season comment to you, because it was. It was decades ago at church. Again, it was a someone on staff actually the time was talking about a Sickness for their child. Now probably have sold a story before, but it's one of those. It just like Rings the gong of my head every time I think about it. And they were saying like they were in the hospital and they were just in the hospital for a long time and Didn't know what was gonna happen. And everybody wants to do something and bring your food. Can I come relieve you and you guys go to dinner? Can I? Can I just go by the house in the middle of the yard, can I? You know everybody wants to do something.

Speaker 2:

And he told a story about this guy who didn't ask to do anything, he just showed up to just be and and as I remember it and I'm sure if you went back and listen to it I've got it butchered in my mind but the gist of it was he just knocked on the door and said, hey, I just, I just want to let you know I'm here, I'm gonna sit outside in a chair and just be here with you and man, that story is like rang itself forward in my life so many times where I'm just like I don't, there's nothing I can do. But what if I just went and just was there, you know, and I think it means more than you, I think it means more than people usually think, it means, yeah, and if the shoe's on the other foot like man, I don't want you to do anything, but it should be great if you were there, you know.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and for the right reasons, right yeah, hey, look at me, it's just right here, right, right, right for sure, and with faith. You know, having these conversations and being vulnerable and reflecting on where you might have shortcomings, right, like preparing this is being proactive, because I think you could get bit by the bug at the mountain top, the valley or in between. You know, in the valley, like you alluded to earlier, you might say why me? But at the mountain top, you might say all me, yeah, and you might forgot. You might forgot who got you there, and you get bit by ego and self-pride and all that sort of stuff. Have a constant baseline, no matter where you're at, on the mountains and peaks and in betweens. That faith is the answer.

Speaker 2:

Oh man, it feels Debbie Downer, but like I, somehow I don't feel Debbie Downed about the conversation. Right, I feel like man, this is helpful, a helpful reminder for me and for my soul, and I know it is for folks who feel like they're in the caring bridge season, so to speak. So just remember all these things that revolve around it.

Speaker 1:

Well, we're just trying to be real. I mean, you looked at this, here's real. You looked at this prep sheet that was created with today's thoughts right before recording. You're like, ooh, you know, like, and I'm like it's not. This is how we, this is where we're at, you know, and the nice thing about this podcast and being familiar and comfortable with it is we're not trying to put on a show, we're trying to achieve a purpose, right.

Speaker 1:

Well, let me so if we're trying to put on a show. We'll come up with some glitz and glam and-.

Speaker 2:

I think we gave up on that a long time ago. Right, there's no glitz and glam to this. All three people that are still listening 32 minutes in, right? If you haven't like pulled over and cried yourself to sleep, it's now you're like oh, they're being funny again.

Speaker 2:

Well, let me just linker for one more moment, because part of making it through that season, if you will, is like finding your tribe to use your vernacular. Because, you know, in those moments when I said like I don't need you to do anything, but I sure would like it if you were there, well, I mean, that's you, but not you specifically. That's the general you. It's like your tribe of people, and those are the ones who like show up and just sit outside the door and say, man, I don't need you to do anything and I don't need to do anything for you. I just want to know you there. Let you know that you're here. Let you know that I'm here, brother, that's your tribe, that's the people who shows up, and you have to be running after those folks too, because they're the ones who ring your doorbell and say, hey, I'm just sitting here. I just want to let you know I'm here for you. So, find your tribe, for sure, for sure. All right, should we like play a song or something I don't know Is?

Speaker 1:

that.

Speaker 2:

No, no, no. I was just thinking like kind of we get to the end of a sermon at church and it kind of hits like with a point, and then they like play the song and have like a alter call and everybody's crying and stuff. You know, like we do that, we just play a song. It'll be like low music, kind of acapella, like real rangey, and then at the end we do announcements.

Speaker 1:

Just intense organs, yeah, intense.

Speaker 2:

Intense organs Just heavy on the pipe organ.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, they turn the synth over to pipe organ. Very traumatic.

Speaker 2:

Yeah Well, we don't need to end on a sudden note. I don't think any of this is intended to be sad. I think it's intended to just like help you remember, like lock into the moment as you pass through those seasons. Lock into the, lock into the care bridge moment, dude, but also lock into the, the babies season and the weddings season and the graduations season, and all of it. Like lock into those moments because they're passing us very quickly, just like January did.

Speaker 1:

Yep, and Gerald's going to school us on a few more seasons that we've yet to see.

Speaker 2:

The knee replacement season. Is that the one? Gerald Shallot to knee?

Speaker 1:

Art wheels. But grandpa being a grandpa, oh man. That's going to be a big one.

Speaker 2:

Yes, that's a season two, that's a season two. Well, as we typically do, I feel like this has become the new two step is where I say Kev anything else, and then you're like, nope, that's it. And then I say, so, I guess we'll just do it for old time's sake, but Kev anything else.

Speaker 1:

Yes.

Speaker 2:

Ha, that's whatever, there we go. What else you got?

Speaker 1:

Absolutely nothing.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, absolutely nothing.

Speaker 1:

I just emotionally drained myself out there.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, nothing left of the thing, all right. Well, until we see you guys next week, you'll stay out there and keep moving mountains ā.

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